Well, I promised a short story...

We're only a month away from Halloween, right? Let's go with that.

Lights

by Wade McGrath

     Carrie Fletcher lived in an ancient house of dust, cobwebs, and forgotten memories with two roommates, Tyler and Jeff. The three attended the same university and opted to rent a house rather than pay campus rates for a dorm. The woman they were renting from was at least three hundred years old, and Carrie refuses to tell the story otherwise. Mrs. Prouge. She has hair down to her thighs as white as snow, but about as well-kept as swamp roots. She stood a mere four feet tall, which made it that much more strange how she instilled such unrest in those who talked to her. As if her raspy, quiet voice and talon-like fingernails weren't enough, she required you to bend down and stick your ear right next to her face so that "you youngsters won't miss a thing," she says. Not just that, but she also grasps your shoulder with a grip that feels like she has no intention of letting go. Every time. It didn't help that she lived right next door, so these meetings weren't terribly rare.

     On this night, in particular, Tyler and Jeff were heading out to a party for the evening. As always, they invited Carrie who suggested instead that she stay to fix up the house for her friend who was coming from out-of-state that weekend. "If I get done early, I'll make a grand appearance, alright?" She offered as they shrugged and fumbled out of the doorway into the night. Carrie would normally go with, but she had cataloged the various problems with the house that needed to be handled: Spiders; mice in the basement; carpets that desperately needed vacuuming; a fireplace full of... things; dust on just about everything; and several lights in the guest bedroom that were perpetually flickering.

     With candles lit and music humming in the background, Carrie started on her laundry list of chores. Time passed in tandem with spiders being sucked into a whirring vacuum cleaner. As her list hit the halfway mark, she heard a knock at the door. Turning off her music and death-machine (as the spiders "fondly" refer to it), Carrie ran to let in exactly who she was expecting- "Mrs. Prouge," she started, "what brings you by at this hour?" Tangled, white hair swept behind her as Mrs. Prouge sauntered inside before leaning in towards Carrie, "I just came to check up on you, dear," she wheezed, "do you need anything, dear? Is everything okay with my old girl?" (Why Mrs. Prouge referred to a house she had inherited from her crazy brother two years ago as her "old girl," no one will ever know) Carrie let out a deep breath, "I've just been cleaning her up for a friend who's visiting this weekend. Spiders, vacuuming, dusting-- you know, just basic stuff. You don't happen to have any spare lightbulbs, do you? The ones in the spare room are wonking out on us, and I didn't buy any before moving in." Mrs. Prouge's face tightened and her smile dropped to a serious frown, "child, you mustn't change the lights in that room. There are souls trapped in there, you know."

     Carrie chuckled, remembering the same speech Mrs. Prouge had given her the day they moved in. They all chose to take the other available rooms in lieu of dealing with the lights at the time, but now Carrie couldn't humor Mrs. Prouge about the issue. "I'm sure it'll be okay, Mrs. P. I'll put the old bulbs somewhere safe, okay?" Mrs. Prouge didn't relax her stance, "child, if those lights are unscrewed, the souls are lost forever. Those lost souls have been known to do... things to protect themselves." Carrie scoffed, "what, like, poltergeist stuff? Are you telling me that room is haunted, Mrs. P? Besides, there aren't that many that are flickering."

     In all, the guest room in the old house had five light bulbs. Three in the ceiling fan, which were all flickering, a completely dead light at the top of the vanity, and a lit bulb in the closet. It wasn't even Carrie's intention to fix the vanity's bulb, since she firmly believed that the piece of furniture was wasted, given that the room was right next to the bathroom. When Mrs. Prouge inherited the house from her brother, he had spun the same yarn about souls that she had recounted to the new tenants. To hear the original story, the ceiling lights haven't been changed in thirty years. A new one had begun flickering each decade. The vanity light, on the other hand, died out long ago, and was simply never replaced.

     "I'll hear none of it, dear," Mrs. Prouge asserted, returning to a polite smile. She grabbed Carrie's shoulder and bent her down, "if any of them are new bulbs the next time I'm in here..." While she couldn't hear the last part of the threat (isn't that what she was trying to prevent with her claw-grip in the first place?), Carrie was certain she heard the word, "spayed." Mrs. Prouge turned around and noted that she was about to get cookies out of the oven and that Carrie should stop by before the night was over. After agreeing, Carrie realized that it was almost midnight by this point. What the hell was she baking cookies for this late at night?? Shaking her head, Carrie proceeded to finish up her cleaning.

     Around two in the morning, Carrie flopped into bed, confident that the house was at least twice as liveable (which wasn't saying much) as before. Tyler and Jeff still hadn't gotten home from the party, so she slowly forced herself up to lock the door and turn out the lights. She turned off the living room light and moved on to the guest room. The ceiling lights were there. Flickering. Still. Carrie glared at them, hoping her silent gaze would somehow fix their faulty wiring. When it didn't, she sighed and flicked the switch. The lights flickered faster, with a slightly louder hum than before. Confused, Carrie batted the lever back up and down again, and was greeted with inky blackness. "Stupid house." She moved back through the living room and around the corner to the hallway and up the stairs at the end before flicking the last light- the one in her bedroom. Collapsing on the bed, she passed out almost instantly.

     Carrie woke with a start. Still dark. Were the guys home? She strained her ears, but was met with silence. She swore she heard something. Carrie turned to her alarm clock- it read a jumble of symbols that resembled numbers without actually being them. Although one figure might have been an upside down four. Carrie clambered out of bed and realized that the bottom of her door was leaking. A small patch of light shone through the crack at the base of the door. The light was flickering. Carrie started toward the door, grabbing her can of pepperspray from the nightstand, worried that someone may have broken in. As she cracked the door, there was no noise but a low hum throughout the house, barely audible. Peeking out, the stairway was dark, but at the landing, she could see a flickering light, dancing around just out of sight. She crept down the stairs, eyes searching for the source of the eery light. Feeling her way through the hallway, she made sure to check the other two bedrooms- dark, but no sign of her roommates.The jittering light was visible just around the corner of the hallway into the living room.

     Passing out of the hallway, her eyes darted all around the living room, attached kitchen, and the front door- still locked- looking for signs of either intruders or her friends- neither were apparent. The light, however, was still faintly visible, now from the guest room, whose door was closed, with the flickering appearing from below the frame. While Carrie didn't remember closing the door earlier, she also noted that she was tired and often closed the guestroom door after cleaning it in the past. Still, the light was unnerving to say the least. Carrie cautiously approached the door, pepperspray in hand, trying to convince herself that it was simply the faulty wiring at work again. Her sweaty hand pressed against the brass knob, cold to the touch. She sat there for what felt like an eternity, heart pounding in her chest, taking deep breaths to calm herself. One last breath, she thought, before steeling herself and turning the knob.

     Tyler thrust the front door open, bellowing as he entered, "we have returned!!" Before kicking off his shoes and slumping into the couch. Jeff stumbled in behind him, flicked the light, and shut the door, "Caaaarriiiiie," he called in a singsong voice. The two shared a look before Jeff shrugged, checking his watch, "well, it is... Five?! Shiiiit. I have to be up for work in four hours. I'm out." Jeff flung himself towards his room, leaving Tyler with the heartwarming sound of a door being drunkenly slammed. "Welp..." He resigned quietly. "Buncha' boring..." he slurred as he hobbled to his own room.

     Tyler awoke, drool covering his... everything, staring off into space for several moments before sloppily wiping his mouth and staring at the clock on his wall. "Twelve hours... New record," he mumbled. Getting up, he groggily plodded to the kitchen table to grab a bowl of his favorite cereal, Captain Skrumps. On the box was a note, "Hey Ty, I think Carrie went to pick up her friend at the station. Guestroom still has crap lights. Picking up bulbs on my way home. PS- getta' job. Love Jeff." The note actually had a heart in place of the word, "love."

     Tyler slowly finished his cereal, reminding himself that the note was left before 10:00, meaning Jeff's shift was already over. As he came to this conclusion, Jeff kicked in the door, confirming his suspicions. "Heyo! Carrie back yet?" Tyler yawned, "haven't seen her. I may have been sleeping for the... whole day..." Jeff shrugged, as he often did, "well, I got the bulbs, let's go kill these devil-lights." Tyler sat up and headed into the guestroom with Jeff, turning on the light as they entered. "Stupid house," Jeff muttered, glancing at the three flickering bulbs in the ceiling. He tossed a pack of lights to Tyler, who began unscrewing the worn and dusty hunks of glass. Each one slowly flickered away the last of their luminescence before fading away. Jeff's phone buzzed in his pocket. He flipped it open and shook his head. "Where the hell is she?" Tyler glanced down while screwing in the third ceiling bulb, "what's up?" "Her friend is texting me. She's been at the station for two hours. She had to get my number online. I think we're gonna' have to go pick her up." Jeff lightly kicked the wall as he headed out of the room to grab his shoes. "You comin'?"

     "Yeah," Tyler called back, "just gimme one second. I gotta' change this last bulb." He leaned across the vanity tucked in the corner of the room and started unscrewing the flickering bulb. The low hum from the bulb grew louder and more erratic. As it finally relented and fell out of its socket, the bulb flew up into the air and landed on the carpet, "Goddamn thing shocked me!" Tyler shouted, sucking on his thumb. He bent down to collect the fallen bulb, when he noticed something else under the vanity- a small, silvery canister. He retrieved it, leaving the bulb on the ground, "Hey Jeff, isn't this Carrie's pepperspray?" "Yeah? So?" Jeff shot back, anxious to get out the door. Tyler looked at it quizzically, turning it over once or twice in his hand, before putting it back on the vanity and screwing in the new bulb, which shot to life, bathing the room in more pale light. Tyler strode to the door and, without looking, flicked the switch back off and closed the door.

     In the settled blackness of the guestroom, a single flicker escaped the bulb laying on the ground next to the vanity, before the coil inside turned to dust.

-

Waddles

I'm Always Torn...

Today's segment is on "stickin' yer neck where it don't belong."

When I say I'm always torn, it's because I'm a naturally argumentative person. I like discussions, and I think humans can learn from each other, both through calm discussion and through debate.

However, I also don't like the cognitive dissonance of knowing that I'm speaking when people don't want me to. I realize many people don't like debate and many people, even further, don't see value in debate, so my presence in an opinion they've shared is nothing but an unwanted burden to them.

Clearly, (if you know me through this medium, anyway) I'm talking about Facebook more than anything else. Someone will share an opinion through the public forum that is Facebook, and then I'm faced with the choice of chiming in or leaving well enough alone. This decision isn't as hard if the person is an actual friend of mine (as most of my Facebook friends are), but when it's, say, someone I don't know speaking on a friend's status, the field gets murkier. I don't know their relation to my friend, and I don't know whether or not I may offend them by debating. Is it still worth it?

Ultimately, one of the few things that makes me happy is to help people understand things. If someone comes to me seeking insight into a personal situation or asking for a third-party perspective, I feel relatively at ease, knowing that I have a good grasp of general human psyche and I have a very strong analytical mindset, so I can usually shed some understanding onto a situation if I know enough about it. Similarly, I understand of a lot of the politics going on in America, and it feels good to have someone turn to me for help in understanding some of the jargon.

This alone would be great... except I also hate willful ignorance and stubborn misconceptions (which I admit to having myself). So, a debate can be just as much about combating "evil" as it is providing guidance and understanding. [I really should learn to focus on the latter...]

Some days, I feel nothing but scornful eyes and tired sighs when I express my opinions, since many of them are nothing more than repeats with new evidence, and it does get somewhat old. I assure you though, I do this because humans are forgetful, and if we do not press an issue and beat it like a generic sexual innuendo, then it will slip our minds.

There is a rare day, once in a blue moon, that someone will come to me with no question and no situation to analyze- simply gratitude for speaking. This is the thing that keeps me from quitting outright.


Personal backstory time-

I went through a bought of depression senior year of college. Mostly because growing up scares the bejeezus outta' me. I'm terrified of the idea of getting a big boy job and working 9-5 every day for the next forty years. That shit is nerve wracking to me. In therapy, the other main issue that kept coming up is how depressing and scary politics is. Granted, this was during the search for a nominee, so we had the likes of Rick Santorum and Michelle Bachmann and Newt Gingrich polluting the airwaves with vitriolic and sometimes simply stupid messages. The part that scared me is that they had vehement supporters.

Side story- as an avid internet user, in the past five years, I've never seen the internet so collectively attack an issue like SOPA/PIPA. It took months of constant attacks from the public to get congress to throw it away, but they still did it begrudgingly. They did it while referring to internet experts as "nerds." They did and said everything so casually, it was clear they had no clue what powers they were tampering with. Despite that, they kept going because the likes of the MPAA were paying them gobs of money to pursue it. This is TERRIFYING to me. It took us months and an enormous amount of energy to beat it, but they can bring it back up with a few days' worth of work and some new wording. How can we keep this fight up forever? Especially when most people can't come together on most issues.
This is why we're losing the fight for cleaner, renewable energy sources. This is why we're losing the fight against pollution and fracking. This is why we're losing the fight against Monsanto. This is why Occupy Wallstreet basically died.
It's not just an uphill battle- it's a battle on a damn ninety degree wall. They hold the high ground and it feels helpless to oppose them. Largely because in our lifetimes, we see very little demonstrable change away from the status quo.

When we make so little difference, I have to wonder what the point is. So yes, I went through a bad bout of depression because of this stark realism. A professor of mine for whom I have more respect than I can express in words once said something I try to keep in mind. To paraphrase, "As a professor, my job is to impart wisdom and make students re-examine themselves. Most won't do it, but if I can make a single student do it each year, I'm changing those people and the people they touch." (I butchered this to hell and a half, so I apologize if you're reading this, Mel)

That's the only thing I can do to justify living in this world.
So, when my choice is between not gettin' all up in someone's business on Facebook or maybe changing how someone perceives the world or politics, then I try to choose the latter. I'm getting better at differentiating between a battle that cannot be won and an uphill battle.

I hope this gives you some idea of why I'm an annoying pest about politics.
And the offer to help anyone who needs it on any subject is basically always there. I'm confidential and I like to think I have a decent track record for helping people when they come to me.

-
Waddles

Parenting

This is gonna' be great. I'm about to do a rant about parenting, despite being a 22 year old male with no parenting experience, and not even so much as a little brother that I had to care for growing up through the tough time that was my parents' hilariously exploded marriage (we'll save that for another post).

Parenting.

Stop, you're doing it wrong. (I find it difficult to progress from here, as I sit staring at the words I just typed for 5 minutes, noting that I'm making a huge over-generalization and wondering how I should justify that bad, over-generalization)

Parenting is not for raising a little clone. Parenting is not for living out your hopes and dreams. Parenting is not for raising a warrior for your causes. Parenting is not for having another pair of hands to work for you. Parenting is not for hoping that they will, one day, become rich so that you can live off of them.
In short-
Parenting is not a means to an end.

You are creating a life that is its own unique existence. One that will inevitably grow to disagree with you on some things and agree with you on others. One that will have a separate opinion on love, religion, life, war, and many many other things. Regardless of what you teach them, they will have some questions and some differences. Embrace that beforehand.

When you raise a child, instill your moral values through your actions. Let them come to understand the world through appropriate action. Once they have reached an age of intellectual independence, let them make the big decisions on their own, but be there to guide them insomuch as answering the questions that they have.

Be there as a safe base, but do not control. Be there without being distant. Be the healthy middle-ground. Your independent child will inevitably come to make a choice about their career and their religion and their relationships and their (etc.) on their own. Let them, but ensure that they have a reason. Ensure that they have properly asked the important questions and indeed, answered them as well. Help them to answer these questions.

Be the help. Be the guide. Be there to ask and to lead to the answers, but do not answer for them. Otherwise, they will not learn to answer them on their own.

Children are not you. They are their own. Let that flourish.

-
Waddles

Day off

Today is friday.

It has not been a good day.

I'm taking a day off of blogging, and I sincerely apologize for any who were interested in hearing me incoherently ramble for a page or two worth of text.

-
Waddles

Texting and Driving

Hey there, non-political post, how are you?
I'm doin' alright, but you know, I do have this one problem.
What's that?
People being stupid and reckless for absolutely no reason whatsoever.
How d'ya mean?

Well, you remember that political post you made a little ways back about personal responsibility and freedom?
Yup.
You forgot to include a big ranty-ravey thing about people that do stupid, dangerous shit just because it's a "free country."
Like what?

Three big ones- Three instances of needlessly stupid shit that have no real positive benefits.

1. Not wearing a helmet on a motorcycle (and to a lesser extent, bicycle).
2. Not wearing a seat belt.
3. Texting while driving.
Now, when I say "real" positive benefits, what I mean is that your best argument for benefits for the first two are a slight improvement in how comfortable you are, and looking "less silly" for the helmet. Those are both BS for the safety offered. The third one arguably has the benefit of transmitting information more quickly, however, if you're that desperate, you can call the person, which you still shouldn't do, but it's oodles more safe, and achieves your desired "benefit" more efficiently than texting in the first place.

These three things piss me off like no other. Here you are, a human with friends, loved ones, and sometimes dependents, putting your life at risk for what amounts to no reason at all. Sometimes it's out of habit, but my favorite is when people argue that they should be allowed to go without a seat belt. Like it's some horrible inconvenience to wear a damned seat belt. Better still, though, are the people who text while driving when someone else is in the car.

You may be fine putting your own dumbass life on the line to drum out 18 poorly-spelled words to your besty about how wasted you're getting later this week, but you have NO right to put anyone else's life in danger.
When you have people over to your house, it's common courtesy to play the role of the host and politely offer refreshments or whatever's necessary to make sure their stay isn't totally miserable. Furthermore, their safety from your housing is your responsibility. If you setup bowling balls along the rafters and they fall and kill someone, that's your fault. The same courtesy applies to driving. When you have someone else in your car, you put on your best "responsible driver" face, and you don't take unnecessary and stupid risks.
If you're scared your besty'll be offended that you're not texting every 30 seconds, tell them ahead of time that you're driving a friend somewhere. If they're still offended, they're probably not worth being friends with.

If, however, you're interested in committing suicide in the first place, might I recommend talking it out with someone you trust? If you're still positive, there are cheaper, faster, easier ways than driving around without a seatbelt while texting. (Imagine a motorcyclist texting while driving. Shit's scary)

Seriously. Just stop. Stop putting your life and others' happiness in jeopardy for nothing. There is no sense to it, and you're just being a stubborn asshole. I don't care how well you can multitask. Don't force other people into the uncomfortable position of repeating themselves after they politely ask you not to text while driving.

-
Waddles

PS- all of this applies about drinking and driving too, and I sure as hell better not have to tell you that much.

The Constitution...

So, ignorant me finds out that it's constitution day upon waking up.

I read a few facebook posts on the matter, and I sat down and started thinking. The end of that metaphorical train track is a series of thoughts that may be somewhat controversial. I don't fully have a handle on them myself, so bear with me for a bit.

*ahem*

To hell with the constitution.

Now now, before you raise your pitchforks and your child assassins, let me explain.
This may be the document that solidified and gave us our basic rights as citizens, but I have a few super huge issues with it that cannot be solved without a total rewrite.

1. It wasn't even remotely perfect from the get-go. They had to more than double what was on the original bill of rights based on issues they didn't address from the start. These include, but are not limited to: voting rights, slavery, citizenship, prohibition, the repeal of prohibition, presidential rules/terms, income tax, etc.

2. Many of the amendments are scattered and relate to the same issues, so there's much room for consolidation. Central examples would be presidential amendments, limitations of congress, and prohibition of alcohol.

3. The language in which many of the rights was written is completely outdated since the advancement of time and culture had warped their original purpose. A fine example here is the right to bear arms, which was intended for the protection of militia forces. Militias are, however, trained like private soldiers- something we simply do not have in this country in any decent size anymore. This is because militias are not necessary, and the closest we have are ragtag batches of over-zealous racists on the Mexican border who are willing to shoot first and ask questions later. (Generalization included, not all border patrol are racists)
Another good example? Quartering troops. We haven't had domestic movement of military in ages. Even if we did have a domestic war of some kind, military bases have been established for holding troops. The language is archaic and needs updated to fit the 21st century.

4. Due to the problems caused by #3, congressional figureheads can (and have) misused the "founding fathers' intent" in enacting new legislation or the attempt to repeal old legislation. Because our constitution relies so heavily on the original intent of some guys who were no smarter than humans are now, we cannot possibly be certain when we take a bold new step towards progress since tradition is so heavily valued. Not only is enacting new legislation painful and time-consuming because of this, but repealing old useless legislation is next to impossible!
(Theoretically, however, humans seek a scapegoat and an excuse to hate each other, so updated language wouldn't truly solve these problems, but at least it may hinder them).

5. For the purposes of argumentation, congressional figureheads have taken to treating certain amendments as less valid than others (just like old testament verses!). Some (notably libertarians) insist that income tax is not constitutional, despite there being an amendment for just that. However, these same people don't (usually) question the right to vote for women or the abolishment of slavery (okay, Ron Paul's come pretty close...).

6. There is no language in our constitution about contextually important technology that's risen in the last few decades. There is nothing about medicine, nothing about the internet, nothing about globalization. And why should there be? It didn't exist when the document was written.

What we come to is the hard truth that the constitution just isn't contextually appropriate anymore. Thomas Jefferson even suggested at the time that the constitution be rewritten once every two decades or so (17 years if memory serves) to avoid being mired in the language and thoughts of the past. I couldn't put it more aptly, because that's exactly the problem that we face.
We must rewrite the constitution. Unfortunately, the burden of writing it could not fall upon anyone in this day and age. Political vitriol is at its height, and there is no group that could write such an important document right now. The Democrats are centrist, and the Republicans are to the far right.

Either the "left" needs to actually move to the left, or the right needs to reel it in some before a true agreement could be made towards a new constitution.


#constitutionproblems

-
Waddles

Give Up on Life Pants

I was watching Adventure Time the other day, as I so often do, and one of the main characters made a statement that I thought was just beautiful.

"Jake, don't you call sweatpants, "give up on life pants?"
"Peeps need to respect themselves when they leave the house. Even if it's just for ice cream or TP or whatevs."

As I've reflected on this and the state of the general public (noting if you visit somewhere like Wal-Mart how many people are wearing sweat pants), I've come to a truly stark realization.

This is nothing short of an epiphany- a heavenly parting of the clouds of confusion that muddled my mind and held back the flow of understanding.
It is nigh impossible to impart upon you the level of clarity with which I now see the world.

I shall, in turn, provide you with this insight-- this knowledge of the gods-- that you too might feel the sensation of sweet serenity that passes through my brainmeat like a warm sunbeam passing over an open meadow.

Are you ready?

Are you absolutely prepared for the realization that I came to?
What I knew after arduous self-reflection?







I knew....

At that moment...

In that glorious, shining beacon of time stood still...

That I wanted ice cream.
Fairly badly.

Not like... enough to kill for it or anything, but I'd like it a decent amount.

I thought you should be privy to that as well.

(Don't you feel better now?)

-
Waddles

(more serious post on Monday, I'm sure)

Something... new? Something new!!! (Games)

I've bungled on about politics long enough, right? Right. So today, we enter another topic near and dear to my heart. (For reference, politics is neither near nor dear, it is simply necessary that we stay informed in this day and age, so I bite the bullet on that one)

Games.

To anyone who knew me during my wacky college years (I am exactly the same person still), I had a lot to do with games. Humans Vs. Zombies, Smash Brothers tournaments, weekly board/card game nights, the like.

The people who know me perhaps a bit more intimately may be aware that I developed two games of my own as well. Yes, gaming is important in my life, and I thought I'd take the opportunity this week to remind my readers (I think I have readers at any rate) of the amazing and marvelous directions that games are headed in.

To start on the topic of games that even non-nerds play (we can't have all the fun), Humans Vs. Zombies is a game that only recently became popular, largely due to college campuses everywhere taking it up in force. It's basically Tag, except that the person who's "it" recruits the other players to his team by tagging them. He's the lone zombie infecting all the living humans. There are a few more crucial differences- for example, in HvZ, the game lasts for days at a time (or longer) and is often played during normally scheduled activities such that your commute to classes becomes a terrifying life-or-death sprint through campus, followed by an hour of being paranoid about leaving the room. The other main difference is that human players can defend themselves from zombie attacks with approved projectiles (socks and nerf guns typically).

Why am I saying all this? Because it's important to recognize that so much popularity and fun can be derived from a game using a very simple set of rules and very minimal props (socks are pretty cheap from thrift stores). Not only is it a blast to play for a few hours, but you get a heightened sense of adrenaline for basically the whole week, along with some great exercise, bonding experience, and an overall sense of accomplishment. I must stress this: This game requires so few props and is so easy to set up, yet provides so much entertainment. It's emergent gameplay at its finest.


I'm also excited about traditional game platforms (board games and card games) though. Not to downplay the fun that some people have with purely luck-based games, but I'm incredibly delighted that stores like Barnes & Noble and Target have begun picking up Euro Games. This is a class of game that you can learn more about here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/German-style_board_game

Euro Games employ more strategy and downplay the importance of luck. They almost always don't eliminate players before the game's end either.

When people find out I'm a board gamer, if they're not familiar with the type of game I play, they often envision Risk or Monopoly and they're justifiably wary. I've noticed that most people who "aren't gamers" are really just people who are jaded with the simplicity and boring nature of American games. These are people who:

1. Get bored doing the same thing over and over again without thinking about it (rolling dice in Monopoly and buying every property you can).
2. Get bored with games that kick them out quickly (Being the first to lose in Risk and sitting out for another two hours).
3. Get frustrated with games that rely on the throw of the dice instead of the person's individual intellect (Plenty of games).

These are common annoyances that are quite often addressed by Euro Games. However, a valid complaint is that sometimes the Euro Games swing too far to the opposite side. Some are overly complicated with far too many rules and intricate setups. Discerning between the good and the bad takes some time, but I haven't introduced many people to these games without having them come back for more.
Examples of good introductory EGs are few and far between, but Settlers of Catan represents a cross between the luck (dice rolls every turn) of American games, and strategy (deciding placement and personal mechanic building) of EGs. Ticket To Ride is another such game that treads both worlds and is easy to learn.
However, once you've picked up how Euro Games function, you can begin the plunge into:
Dominion
Carcassonne
Race for the Galaxy
Seven Wonders
Small World
Stone Age
and many others. The hobby is one that I recommend to anyone who likes intellectual stimulation when mixed with fun.


Our final topic of the evening-- video games.
The two things impressing me most about video game technology is the emergence of voxels instead of polygons and virtual reality.
1. Holy shit you guys, have you seen voxel technology used well?! As someone who grew up loving video games when the N64 came out, polygons have been ingrained into my brain as the "norm." While technology has improved, there's still plenty of obvious polygon technology in video games. But voxels? Jesus tap-dancing hullabaloo, that stuff is impressive.
2. Virtual reality. Ten years. Mark my words.

Games are getting better and more accessible in every way with the exception of plot, which isn't technology-based. Combine the height of technology with amazing writing and you have my favorite stuff in the world. Ever.

(When Bioshock 1 first came out, I swear...)

Anyway, yeah, games are impressive, and even if you're not a gamer, you should consider dipping your feet into the territory. Loads of fun.

-
Waddles

On Resumes and work (read: I'm a lazy, spoiled child)

Okay, so I'm still unemployed- to start this funfest off.

The interwebs have had no shortage of advice for peppering up my resume. What's funny is that these recommendations are so often contradictory. And I'm not talking small contradictions either... We're talking straight 180 degree flops. One good example- I've heard from people whose job it is to help with student resumes that you should include things that you learned from previous jobs instead of specific duties you had. Contrarily, I've heard from job recruiters/interviewers that you should absolutely note specific duties so as to convey your abilities that have been proven in the workforce already.

It's things like this that highlight a growing trend in my life (and I'm sure many other young people in similar positions): Everyone wants you to follow procedures in order to progress in life. No one wants you to follow the same procedures.

Let's give an example my fellow college students/graduates should be intimately familiar with- formal paper writing. Every academic pursuit seems to use a different set of highly stringent rules for citation, footnotes, page numbers, and certain grammar rules; Chicago, MLA, APA, etc. Of course, this isn't some deathly important controversy, it's just kind of... well, annoying.
As if that wasn't enough though, these individuals paper styles change their own rules on a yearly basis, despite most of the changes being absolutely unnecessary. An example of an MLA change I had to deal with from one year to the next was the position of the name relative to the number used in page numbers. Why does that ever need to change?!

This brings me more specifically to the topic of resumes and applications. Every company page for online applications seems to have a different format that they want you to follow in order to collect the same damned information each time. This is a flat-out problem. I could apply to ten jobs using the same format for resume uploading in the time it takes to go over and re-write all of the same information I already had on the resume that they had me upload in the first place. There is no reason whatsoever for there to be no unified resume style for the purposes of online application. It would make everyone's life easier, and it would drastically reduce confusion by new job applicants who are not used to resume writing.
What's more shocking to me, and this is more of a critique of America in general than anything, is that our school systems do not prepare us for this unless we go out of our way to seek the knowledge. I had to sit through several years of math classes that I will objectively never use, but our education system couldn't see fit to teach me how to write a resume? Or fill out an application? Or how to get a loan? Or how to sign a lease? Or things to look for when doing any of these? It's absurd the amount of effort America goes through to teach completely useless material while avoiding teaching things that would legitimately aid students in their everyday struggles.

[Side note: Don't get me wrong, math is important if you're going into a field where math is important. But if someone isn't interested in math by the time they're through algebra or pre-calculus, something tells me that extra class or two won't turn them away from their passion for art or theater or philosophy.]

Can we agree on a damn system, people?

-
Waddles

(Abrupt end because I don't really know what else to say on the topic at this exact moment.)

Freedom and You

Hello Blogosphere,

I'm interested in the topic of freedom today. Something we hear in much of the dialogue and rhetoric that pervades our society. We hear about it in politics, religion, law, and in common musings by the citizens of this country.

Why freedom? Well, honestly, I started off this post with the name, "Freedom of Religion and You," because someone got into a bit of a row with me today (doesn't that always manage to happen?) on the topic of women's freedom to choose (or lack thereof in some cases). However, I realized that the lone freedom of religion is a little too narrow for me.

Let's begin with the most common misconception of "freedom:"

"It's a free country, so I can do whatever I want." This is the most often cited argument by people who simply have no idea how anything works and their aim is in justifying actions which would otherwise be problematic. This fundamentally lacking grasp of "freedom" comes from a single missing element- Consequence.

When we talk about "freedom," a true understanding includes the inevitable consequences that come from having freedom. Namely, responsibility. Although, there are many other consequences for having freedom, taking responsibility for our free thoughts and actions is the central one that comes to mind.
This is a main theme in a common philosophical discussion regarding determinism. Let me just give you a brief overview of the quandary.

Does God exist? If It does, does It have a plan? Or is It at least omniscient? A being outside of time that knows the past, future, and present to a faultless degree. Does this circumstance remove humankind's propensity for free will? Can we have independent thought if it's all written in stone? At the very least, the concept of free will and choice are dubious in a world where God knows what you will do before you do it. As such, there's an argument to be made that you did not have a choice. In that situation, we have a passable argument against taking responsibility for any wrong-doing we commit, since it was not within our capacity to avoid doing it.
Regardless of whether or not you buy into this argument, it's not something that can easily be proven true or false.

The point is this- if you do not agree that the future is pre-determined and you are fated to make every thought and action that you make, then you must accept the other side of the coin- Freedom. Free will. Responsibility.

Re-examining the argument by hilarious people, "It's a free country, so I can do whatever I want," it's technically absolutely true. You are allowed to do anything you please. However, you also have to accept responsibility for those actions. If you break the law, you will have to go to suffer legal punishment. If you're a jerk, people probably won't like you. If you break a chair, you won't be able to sit in it. Some of these consequences are relational, some are concrete, and some are somewhere in the middle, but there will always be a consequence for anything that you do (or don't do).

*deep breath*

Well, I know I didn't cover that as well as I wanted to, but this is a bit of a stream-of-consciousness thing, so we're moving right along.

Religion. Now, I don't have any problems with religion (well...). You can believe whatever you want. This country is founded on that principle, in fact. It's in one of those pesky amendments to the constitution. One of the early ones I think. It's in one of the first two definitely.
This is where a common argument surfaces that also shows a deep misunderstanding of the language of freedom. And, I apologize in advance to Christians, because this will be about some of you-
Certain Christians seem to be under the impression that there is an attack on religion occurring in this country- an attack on Christianity, specifically.

This is in the wake of creationists being treated less and less like adults (because they continue to show a level of critical thinking consistent with children), the removal of certain phrases from common parlance ("Merry Christmas," for example); the expressed desire to take the word, "God" out from certain federal items such as money, the pledge of allegiance (creepy enough as it is), and other such things; and, of course, the birth control debate that is/was raging recently.
The reaction from the religious right has been... less than pleasant regarding these issues, as I said, citing a flat-out assault on religious values.

Now, let me be absolutely clear on this- Our government shall make no laws respecting a particular religion. We can argue semantics over whether required use of the word, "God" constitutes a law, but hear me out- Taking "God" out of federal/public wheelings and dealings isn't an affront to your religion. It's a correction of an affront to every other religion. Imagine how you would feel if the pledge or our currency used, "Allah." I'm sure you'd be offended because that is not your God (technically, it is. But that's a discussion for another time). You do not recognize It in the way that I do not recognize YAHWEH, or your God. This issue has nothing to do with the desire for your religion to be lesser or anything. It's entirely the desire for all religions to be both equal and out of public eye.
There should be no public prayers, no set of commandments outside courtrooms, no facing Mecca during classes, no Hanukkah celebration during a taxpayer funded banquet (do those exist?). All of these things are absolutely fine in private buildings, private businesses, private spaces, and with private funds. However, the second these things become public or use public funding, the state is respecting a particular religion, which it sort of promised not to do back when we told England to piss off.

To reinforce that- your freedom of religion is to practice your faith in a private residence or building, devoid of public interference or funding (barring extreme circumstances like human rights violations). This right- this freedom- is not being attacked by anyone who matters.
[As a side note, it still offends me that we can't elect a non-Christian president, and the word, "atheist" is stigmatized worse than, "socialist."

Freedom is a fascinating and very intricate issue, but just because you don't always get your way doesn't mean that freedoms are being deprived from you- that was never the intention of the concept of "freedom." Take responsibility for your thoughts and actions, and always consider, when you think your freedoms are at stake, whether or not you getting your way would make someone else feel like their freedoms are at risk.

Sorry for the wall o' text-- Monday's will be shorter... probably.

-
Waddles

PS- I know I didn't talk about women freedoms at all in a post that was originally pretty centered around them. I'll get to it another day when I can devote more energy to not being frustrated at less educated folk.

DNC and Messages

The Democratic National Convention has begun.

I'm full of shame and goo, as I only caught Michelle Obama's speech, despite hearing that the others were also powerful.

It's difficult to know where to begin with this particular topic, because I must confess that I wasn't super interested in her speech- not because I didn't agree with it entirely- but because on some level, I expect human beings to communicate all the time the way she did last night. Honestly, passionately, personally, and with empathy and clear regard for others.

I'm struck by the public response to her speech, which is a response of awe, surprise, and inspiration. The vast majority of short opinions I've heard about the speech note that it gives hope and pride for America. In the 21st century, it's a miracle to hear someone speak so passionately about all citizens receiving a fair shake. It's a miracle to hear about how love is love no matter which consenting adults are involved. It's a miracle to hear about such a large movement towards healthier foods, inclusive communities, and opportunity for each person.

This is certainly the pessimist in me, but why are these miracles? Since when was a winning political platform simply to "not be an asshole"? We live in a nation comprised largely of self-described Christians- in a nation of immigrants- land of the brave, home of the free-- And yet, someone being a stand-up human who cares about others is what's winning the day?
When did we go so far backwards that this could become a "someday" pipe dream?

Don't get me wrong- Kudos to Mrs. Obama for being her own person and, indeed, being a truly phenomenal person at that. But why did it take this long to get someone with a heart not made of stone in a position like this? And why does roughly half of the country look DOWN on her for it?!

I'll walk away from this post knowing that it's an unpopular and pessimistic approach to the issue, but I do think it should be recognized that should be the standard for human behavior, not the pinnacle. And if we treat it as the pinnacle, we rationalize behavior that falls below it. We justify acts and attitudes that, in this day and age, are unacceptable.

Can't we all just... grow up and learn to get along? That'd be super.

-
Waddles

An Obligation

It's Labor Day. A day for appreciating all that's been sacrificed in order to give Americans a fair shake in factory jobs. In order to recognize what was truly gifted to the American people through the industrial revolution's unions, we take a day off- something that was far less acceptable back then.

I think part of the problem with modern rhetoric is that we look to the past for guidance about some issues, but not others- and when we do look to the past, we often look to an irrelevant past that holds no analogical significance to current situations. In particular, I'm referring to Libertarians today.

Now, don't get me wrong- I think Libertarianism has a lot to offer to the national discussion. Ending the drug war, dropping indefinite detention, and keeping free speech unregulated (both on the internet and in the physical world). There's the messy war issue too. They aren't fond of war.
However, today's subject is the biggest reason I fear Libertarianism- they have a fetish for unbridled capitalism in its purest form, confident that the free market will drive down prices, drive up competition, and allow the consumers to use their money to sway corporate images and accepted policy.
That's all awesome on paper. If it worked. Unfortunately, human nature is to fear competition. So, what happens is that a wealthy person with a company, let's say it sells chairs, will purchase other chair companies that pop up in order to reduce competition. In doing so, they're also spreading their own brand and image. Soon, this chair company becomes synonymous with the word "chair," such that most people would rather buy from them than a store that they've never heard of. At this point, the chair company has the means and influence to receive chairs or chair parts from anywhere in the world- a third world country that uses slave labor, more often than not- at the cheapest price possible. This gives way to the chair company selling chairs for less than would otherwise be possible.

Local startup chair business opens across the street, but they can't compete. They don't outsource their work either because they think it's wrong or they don't have the resources to do so. They also don't have the selection or convenience of the big chair company, so they're more expensive, less convenient, and less of an attraction for consumers. Big chair company doesn't even have to buy them out at this point because the smaller business simply cannot survive in this economic climate. Short of another independently wealthy person starting another huge chair company, the original big company has no "real" competition.

What we wind up with is a few mega-companies controlling all (or nearly all) of the business in a specific field, using unbeatable prices, selling shoddy merchandise, and offering it more easily and conveniently than otherwise possible.
Examples:
Wal-Mart, Kroger, K-Mart (currently dying), Target, Meijer
Burger King, Wendy's, McDonald's, Taco Bell, KFC
BP, Sunoco, Mobile, Speedway
Tyson, Banquet
Nike, Adidas
Microsoft, Apple
Monsanto

These companies have the money and reach to place themselves in nearly every American's life, such that we're forced to deal with them. What's more is that these companies are also harmful on the supply side of the chain! These corporations are the companies to do business with. If you aren't supplying to them, you aren't making enough money (because no one else is in the business). So, if you're a local farmer, you have to be selling to just a few potential people. What this means is that those companies can hold you to whatever regulations and fines they want, and if you fight back, they can terminate your contract, putting you out of a desperately needed job that cannot be filled elsewhere.
Even if you're not distant from the process, you're still treated like garbage. The individual employees for these companies more often receive minimum wage and no working benefits, largely because the companies can get away with it thanks to a lack of competition upholding higher standards. Wal-Mart doesn't have to give you a living wage or benefits because there's always a line of hungry potential workers available and willing to work for minimum wage- because as sucky as minimum wage is, it's better than being unemployed. For the same reasons, these companies can start to slowly destroy the other working conditions we've fought so hard to obtain in the past. More and more, illegal wages are being offered, people are working more than 40 hours a week (often at one job, but also often at multiple because they need to in order to survive), and people are working in increasingly unsafe conditions, whether in this country, or in the countries providing labor FOR our country.

The end result? These companies do nothing but grow, allowing them access to even cheaper labor, offering even cheaper prices, forcing competition even deeper underground.

This situation is possible in such a state as a result of globalization and the increased ability to transmit goods and information over distances more easily. However, the situation is still reminiscent of America's own industrial revolution when factories were allowed to make whatever demands they wished of their employees because, much like today, there was an excess of unskilled labor and a lack of available jobs for everyone. As a result, work could be 14 hours long for a dollar a day, where you had to run the risk of cutting off limbs each time you were around heavy machinery.

Unions. Enter Unions. The power of the people manifested in a single-function group that could bring a factory to a standstill by collectively refusing to work so as to obtain better benefits. Of course, they couldn't technically stop non-union workers from taking their jobs, but they could apply all of the collective shame they had at their disposal to these interlopers. With enough empathetic support from the community, any union strike could destroy the profit potential of a factory, forcing the mega-rich owners to rethink their business practices.
What followed next in history was the creation of minimum wage laws, child labor laws, safer working conditions, a reasonable scheduled work-week. Regulations to prevent the abuse of the common man by people in power.

I know I've made a super-circle around the topic, so I'll get to the point here-
Libertarianism's favor for unbridled capitalism is an encouragement of the behavior and attitudes that led to the original factory problems of the industrial revolution and indeed, the problems we face today with mega-corporation that monopolize their respective sectors.
Libertarianism encourages the removal of strict regulation on corporations, again, ensured that the free market itself will prevent abuses of power.
Perhaps I'm jaded by history, but I'm convinced that most (certainly not all) people who obtain power do so out of an ambition that is complemented by greed. This greed distances them from the moral obligation to avoid abusing their power. Instead, they do whatever props them up higher in the economic world, stepping on anyone in the way.

It's Labor Day. And I'd just like to remind all three of my readers that the corporate world is currently unstable as a result of poor regulation. We faced a $700 billion bailout because of it, followed by a recession the likes of which America hadn't seen in decades. Even still, we face corporations owning tight monopolies, while smaller businesses are unable to compete thanks to the double-edged sword of globalization.
It's distinctly possible that we can't do much, if anything, about this in our lives, but I'd just like you to keep in mind this state of affairs. Don't let yourself forget that there was an ideal forged by the unions that America is starting to leave behind in favor of the very thing that caused unions to exist in the first place.

Those who are unfamiliar with history are doomed to repeat it.

-
Waddles