Welcome to the Black Friday edition of my blog, per request from an old friend. (Which is great- I had nothing else to write about and it was gonna' come off as kinda' half-hammed)
Black Friday is... well, incredibly American. It just seems appropriate that it's in this country that we celebrate one particular holiday immediately following another-
Specifically, we celebrate a holiday in which we give thanks for what and who we have, typically focusing more on the familial relations and good luck that we've encountered in our lives that has allowed us to thrive in a sometimes bleak world.
And then we celebrate a holiday that ignores the previous holiday's message entirely by going out and buying expensive and ostentatious gadgets and gifts.
Before you stop me, yes, I've participated in several black Fridays, so I'm not condemning anyone without condemning myself first.
I spent somewhere in the ballpark of ten hours in line at a Target last year, in fact, waiting with my brothers who were determined to buy a 46" TV for $300. I didn't want anything at the time, I was just talked into going with them to keep them company. So, I froze my assorted limbs and genitalia off while I sat and talked with my brothers. As the night progressed, I was wrangled into seeing the TV as a potential gift from my father, and I eventually acquiesced. I had been sucked into the allure of a brand new TV that I had no use for. I already had a 36" flat screen that suited me fine.
So, after getting the TV, I kept it in its box, trying mildly to sell it for a modest profit. I waited, unable to do even that- For over six months before finally deciding to give my old TV to my parents and just keep the damn thing for myself.
I didn't need it. I didn't even really want it until I was convinced to want it. But isn't that the very essence of American material culture? Ads, commercials, sales, flashing lights, bonus, deluxe, double, super, mega, buy-one-get-one-free, half-off, free samples, Christmas gifts, greeting cards, six-pack, irresistible, limited time offer, gotta-have-it, bulk, salesmen giving sales pitches to increase sales during the once-weekly sale to end all sales!
We're a culture saturated by this idea that you have to have stuff to be happy. That somehow the fact that we own things increases our street cred or our worth to society. It's not what you do or who you are, but what you possess.
Sure, my 46" TV has slightly increased the quality at which I play games and watch movies with my girlfriend. But in the long run, I won't remember the size of the TV mattering a whole lot. It'll be the times I had with people that I remember. And my health and level of life-satisfaction/stress. This is part of why I don't like the consumer culture so much. We've convinced people to compulsively want things so much that people have had their lives ruined by mere objects. People have gone into crippling, irreversible debt just to own things that someone else convinced them they need or want or should have. But is this their fault? Not really. Not anymore so than it's their fault they follow gender norms. When culture pushes something as truth hard enough, we all find ourselves adhering to it, sometimes completely subconsciously. Sometimes against our will.
I don't feel super comfortable wearing a skirt (I've done it before). I know it shouldn't matter. It's a piece of fabric. Clothing. It says nothing about who I am, what I've done, what I'm going to do, etc. And yet, I feel so much more comfortable and in-my-own-skin when I'm wearing jeans. Not for any ideological values I have, lord no. I don't care if some other chap wants to wear a full dress outside. It's because culture has shaped my comfort zones, my wants, my needs, my tastes.
Imagine a world where wife beaters were the stylish article of clothing. Where showing skin was an act of reverence to the natural world and the bodies we've been given. Where academics wore tank tops and high school drop outs wore cardigans to hide their shameful bodies. I can picture that world so clearly and it makes just as much sense as the flip side. Because ultimately, it's fabric- nothing more and nothing less. No article of clothing would mean anything if it weren't for our culturally induced ideas of modesty and fashion.
And in that same way, our culturally induced ideas of consumerism and wanting things has forced people to make irrational and unwise financial decisions in order to feel as though they've "arrived" at the American dream, with a house, a wife and two kids, and two cars. Society has told us to want that life so badly that we're willing to take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt to get there. Once we're there, we realize that there's always something more to want or need. But suddenly, we're so far in debt, we can't move anymore. Our lives stagnate and fall apart.
Objects are not inherently bad. However, we must distance ourselves from their perceived emotional value in order to remind ourselves that there's nothing inherently good about them either. Objects are objects. There for convenience and use.
I think this quote nicely sums it up:
"Love people and use things; don't love things and use people."
There was a much better and more full quote that I couldn't find, but the gist is the same. Stuff is just stuff. Eat a big frozen pizza with your loved ones instead of a giant turkey. Watch a movie, play a board game, or just sit and talk instead of going out and indulging in shopping for more things. (I did catch the irony of mentioning two "things" that you could be doing instead of buying more "things," but I believe that if an object brings you together with people, then it definitely has a good use)
Here's the one way I'll really differentiate from my desire to distance myself from the consumer culture- comfort.
I just got a soft queen sized bed and I'm bringing home an electric blanket this weekend to keep warm. If I could afford a tempur-pedic mattress, I would buy one. When your quality of life can actually be improved through home goods, you jump onto that ship and you buy yourself what you need to be in better health. But if it won't make you healthier in a pretty objective sense, then you probably don't need it.
Finally- I will make an odd recommendation to you- If you've never indulged in black friday- do it once. The full package- wait in line from the night before, huddling together with a loved one for warmth.
Don't do it for the item(s) you're getting though. Do it for the experience. Look around you and really see the other people. See the environment. See what our culture has become. Where our passions lay. Experience the bone-chilling, nighttime temperatures and use it as an excuse to become closer with someone. Experience the soul-crushing weight of object-demand. Revel in it.
It's another perspective to check off the list.
-
Waddles
PS- the real reason you shouldn't shop on Black Friday is that it's artificial demand created by corporations to get you to buy in a frenzy which causes accidents and deaths each year while simultaneously destroying the morale of retail workers everywhere. And I should note that these corporations don't often offer a fair shake to those employees which they force to work Black Friday. See Wal-Mart protests.
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