I am almost certainly not going to last long in this experiment.
I'm a techie and an information junkie. I function via connectivity. Being pulled out from the flow of social information has left me feeling slower and more cavernous.
However, it does appear to be correlated with a reduction in anxiety still. Unclear if I'm just getting over the hump in ulcer stress or if cutting myself off socially is actually helping me decompress. To that end, I think continuing forward as is will be the wisest course of action.
I will write a blogpost daily as planned, and I'll see if reading becomes a little more feasible for me when I have fewer things to occupy my mind with.
Speaking of first impressions, they're a unique and difficult beast. You typically only get the one initial impression before an opinion about you has been rendered. This is a largely irreversible process that most people are not super spectacular at. I've never been much at first impressions, certainly.
I tend to be more of a silent observer on first meetings, speaking only after I've gained a sense of the people around me and I'm reasonably confident I won't be crossing any lines with them. I like to play my hand only after having as much information as I can expect to garner within reason.
But, there are others who are naturally quite charming.
And there are those who are not socially aware enough to realize how horribly they can come across. Everyone has their own unique level of proficiency in this (and any other) skill.
We tend to absorb the first impression we receive of someone and craft a rather elaborate set of opinions based solely on that limited amount of information. These opinions inform how we perceive future interactions with this person, which in turn shades our opinions with our pre-conceived notions. It's a self-sustaining feedback loop designed to reinforce the opinions we already hold. Difficult to break, but not impossible. Typically, it requires a significant event that makes us re-evaluate the foundations we've constructed for a person. Seeing someone we thought selfish being self-sacrificing and not saying anything about it. Watching an "asshole" run, dropping everything, to make sure a friend is okay. Hearing someone "socially inept" make a series of very witty observations that were neither forced nor clung to. Catching someone "heartless" break down and cry about a situation that is not theirs. Knowing an "egotist" who offers true and deep apologies for wrongs they've committed.
It may take extraordinary circumstances in order to so fundamentally change how we perceive someone after a first impression has been established, but it's definitely possible.
We just have to remind ourselves not to get stuck in the same pattern of thoughts, behaviors, and actions. We have to be able to surprise ourselves and others. Constantly grow and strive to be a little closer to our ideal selves every day.
Sometimes, you owe it to people to give weight to their second impression. Not everyone can make a good first impression, and it's a little immature to refuse to re-evaluate previous positions- especially in light of updated or new information. We all have the propensity to be... hasty... in our judgments. We all owe an apology somewhere along the lines for developing a negative opinion pre-maturely.
And, we all owe an apology somewhere along the lines for saying or doing something that undoubtedly left a negative first impression unintentionally.
When my contact with the outside world resumes, I can think of one such person that I owe an apology to for an unfortunate first impression that was my fault.
Perhaps speaking in terms of "owing" and "obligation" is a bit much, but it's respectful and nice to own up to our actions and take responsibility.
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Wad
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